A big saffron 'tika/Tilak" on the forehead and maybe the saffron coloured cloth slung over the shoulders- looking at that makes me recoil, recoil in displeasure, dislike and more importantly "FEAR". These images have stayed from the Gujarat riots, and the old images from Babri Masjid demolition. Now whenever i see a saffron flag posted somewhere in some troubled area, a feeling of premonition and an adrenalin rush.
Today with the terrorists running amok, creating pandemonium and fear, I fear of the future these saffron clad men will take us to. With states like Orrisa and Karnataka already burning and many states recovering and learning to live with the ashes, I wait with a heavy heart to see what is next. The voice of “moderates” are so often unheard so here I am trying to add to these voices knowing its only a drop in the ocean, but then again drops makes up an ocean.
I ‘ve met people who were so anti Muslim that I managed to dismiss them as ill guided humans and guilty of the process of socialization, that they havn’t sent the world. One such person, infact there were other too but one person struck me the most, I met him on a train journey to Gujarat. It was a long journey and traveling alone I was doing wht I presumed was the safest bet for a girl traveling alone, i.e. be uncommunicative, and if needed talk only to the women….lol…
Anyway by the end of the 16th hours of the journey 8 of which I had slept I was bored and was finding it more and more difficult to ignore the conversations buzzing around me. They we all residents of UP and conversations changed from Mayawati, business, Raj Thackrey and god-know-wht-all and then finally they landed on Islam and Muslims. Wht generalization was on and nothing in the positive mind u….i knew it wasn’t a good idea me getting into an argument as I had another 20 hours of train journey to spend with them, but then hw long can u hold on? Wht happened after tht was 2 hours of wht my cousin so often calls “ SOLID” argument. He said I was out of tune with reality while I said the same about him. He said he himself has had instances of some people talking about wanting to set up a Pakistan in India and other things about them always being loyal to Pakistan. Even though I don’t deny that there can be certain section, I believe, very strongly that this section is a miniscule part, something they aren’t willing to give. They infact believe that the people I know form a small majority and even admitted that they had met such person themselves too. Despite all this they stood by there stand and at the end all we agreed to was - ‘agree to disagree’. Why was he different from the others? He was a Doctor, an educated man, with quite liberal views on other issues. And now tht I think about him I recall other “educated” persons nd one tht stickes to my mind is some1 who has studies from two of the best Institutes of our country, but tht’s another story………
Monday, September 29, 2008
FEAR....
A big saffron 'tika/Tilak" on the forehead and maybe the saffron coloured cloth slung over the shoulders- looking at that makes me recoil, recoil in displeasure, dislike and more importantly "FEAR". These images have stayed from the Gujarat riots, and the old images from Babri Masjid demolition. Now whenever i see a saffron flag posted somewhere in some troubled area, a feeling of premonition and an adrenalin rush. Today with the terrorists running amok, creating pandemonium and fear, I fear of the future these saffron clad men will take us to. With states like Orrisa and Karnataka already burning and many states recovering and learning to live with the ashes, I wait with a heavy heart to see what is next. The voice of “moderates” are so often unheard so here I am trying to add to these voices knowing its only a drop in the ocean, but then again drops makes up an ocean.
Friday, September 26, 2008
love
love!! wht is it?? i dont knw hw many times i ve been asked if i beleive in love and i knw my answer has on most occassions has been "not really" or "no". but i havng cn a frnd of mine with her undying, unquestioned love for on person i thought maybe such a thing exisits.....but then again i wonder...........
is it coz ppl r scared of lonliness? is it really there coz one wants it to be tht way so therefore if they can fal out of love if they think otherwise??
i am tired and i guess not making much sense so ta ta...
is it coz ppl r scared of lonliness? is it really there coz one wants it to be tht way so therefore if they can fal out of love if they think otherwise??
i am tired and i guess not making much sense so ta ta...
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
touch
".....we miss tht touch so much tht we crash into each other just so tht we can feel something..."- Crash.
is tht hw it is?? does tht in some way explain hw and why so often i feel tht in circumstances where touch could hav been avoided it wasnt?? Some cynical part answers "no! they were jerks drawing some form of sexual pleasure". but then what abt women? were they too?? doesnt strike the right chord with me....we live such lonely lives, deprived so often love, care that maybe some thought they d find it from a stranger. But wht happens?? its a snub, sometimes subtle sometimes not so, by the likes of the cynic tht resides also in me
is tht hw it is?? does tht in some way explain hw and why so often i feel tht in circumstances where touch could hav been avoided it wasnt?? Some cynical part answers "no! they were jerks drawing some form of sexual pleasure". but then what abt women? were they too?? doesnt strike the right chord with me....we live such lonely lives, deprived so often love, care that maybe some thought they d find it from a stranger. But wht happens?? its a snub, sometimes subtle sometimes not so, by the likes of the cynic tht resides also in me
the pujas is almost here
The feel in the air is diffrnt, the people too seem differnt, the streets, the parks, the roadside shops, the malls all r affected by the festive mood that grips the city every year. If u havnt lived in bengal dont think u can understand hw we feel at the first sight of the 'kash phool' swinging to an unknown tune. The feeling of elation, hope, anticipation and pure joy.
The streets are crowded with people leaving office early to finish last minute shopping, hmm...admist all this chaos though all u can think is tht there is some magic in the air....with ppl looking forward to a holiday, puja hopping, meeting frends and relatives, eating out, waking up to the sound of the 'Dhaak' and watching the glow on the Mother's face while the purohits chant away and the smoke fills up the air and gives it a mystical look.
for those who know me, know tht i crave to get out of the city during this time and this yr is no differnt, but still somewhere in a small part of me the childhood memories live on and wishing to relive the magic tht i once soo felt.
i wish all those ppl who still do feel the magic a very happy pujas.....
The streets are crowded with people leaving office early to finish last minute shopping, hmm...admist all this chaos though all u can think is tht there is some magic in the air....with ppl looking forward to a holiday, puja hopping, meeting frends and relatives, eating out, waking up to the sound of the 'Dhaak' and watching the glow on the Mother's face while the purohits chant away and the smoke fills up the air and gives it a mystical look.
for those who know me, know tht i crave to get out of the city during this time and this yr is no differnt, but still somewhere in a small part of me the childhood memories live on and wishing to relive the magic tht i once soo felt.
i wish all those ppl who still do feel the magic a very happy pujas.....
Monday, September 22, 2008
travel
This is my first attempt at writing in a blog and a feeling of slight apprehension filters in. "am i doing it the right way? is this how its done"?? and then a voice in my head says- "wht the hell, its ur space u make the rules you decide how its to be done". So here it goes. my first blog article is on travel, a passion that has grown as the years hav passed by along with greater appreciation for the journey and not just the destination.
last week went with my family to a place by the name Mayapur a 4 hour drvie from the city of kolkata. history tells u the city was once the capital of Bengal. made famous thanx to the hundreds of temples that throng the city, there is one in particular which draws ppl, its a temple that belongs to ISKCON. even though am not a religious person the spiritual side in me wanted to see the evening aarti with the chanting that give one a feeling of being transported to another world, where the face of people r lit up by the revernce, faith in GOD. but i was unfortunate enough to miss it. what i got to see (besides the temples my family insisited on seeing) was ruins, excavated in the 1980-90 by the ASI of what they beleive to have been a temple of the great king of the Sen dynasty- Balal Sen. the sky was grey the leaves dark green and a slight drizzle in the air that sometimes made my lens a bit wet. a gaurd was present to keep the people off and he shared a bit of light on the little he knew about the place. he said that the fort that the king had buiil had been washed by the river nd the king abandoned it when they were been attacked by afghan invaders.
just behind the ruins was a small lake with dark waters and I saw something move in it, maybe a snake, maybe a fish or maybe my imagination. soon it was time to leave and now all i hav is a few pictures and the little that my brain has managed to save.
the next day we took the local ferry to cross the river to the other side of the town- Nawadip. a faint memory of some1 once telling me that there are River dolphins in these water, flooted in and my squinting eyes (thanx to the sun!!) remained glued to the waters....and guess what i was blessed with a glimpse of what i can only guess might hav been the body of a dolphin and it was gone, too soon!! no1 else saw it. And the local rickshaw person made me doubt what i saw as he said there are no dolphins but only "Shishu". enquiry on returning back confirmed that i was right and thank my stars that i got a glimpse, but the heart desires more and i wait with baited breath till i get a chance to see more in the future.
last week went with my family to a place by the name Mayapur a 4 hour drvie from the city of kolkata. history tells u the city was once the capital of Bengal. made famous thanx to the hundreds of temples that throng the city, there is one in particular which draws ppl, its a temple that belongs to ISKCON. even though am not a religious person the spiritual side in me wanted to see the evening aarti with the chanting that give one a feeling of being transported to another world, where the face of people r lit up by the revernce, faith in GOD. but i was unfortunate enough to miss it. what i got to see (besides the temples my family insisited on seeing) was ruins, excavated in the 1980-90 by the ASI of what they beleive to have been a temple of the great king of the Sen dynasty- Balal Sen. the sky was grey the leaves dark green and a slight drizzle in the air that sometimes made my lens a bit wet. a gaurd was present to keep the people off and he shared a bit of light on the little he knew about the place. he said that the fort that the king had buiil had been washed by the river nd the king abandoned it when they were been attacked by afghan invaders.
just behind the ruins was a small lake with dark waters and I saw something move in it, maybe a snake, maybe a fish or maybe my imagination. soon it was time to leave and now all i hav is a few pictures and the little that my brain has managed to save.
the next day we took the local ferry to cross the river to the other side of the town- Nawadip. a faint memory of some1 once telling me that there are River dolphins in these water, flooted in and my squinting eyes (thanx to the sun!!) remained glued to the waters....and guess what i was blessed with a glimpse of what i can only guess might hav been the body of a dolphin and it was gone, too soon!! no1 else saw it. And the local rickshaw person made me doubt what i saw as he said there are no dolphins but only "Shishu". enquiry on returning back confirmed that i was right and thank my stars that i got a glimpse, but the heart desires more and i wait with baited breath till i get a chance to see more in the future.
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